Atomic Bombshell's Valentine, Comedian Daniel Ponsky

Valentine's Day is my LEAST favorite holiday. Oh the pressure of it all! This Year, Comedian Daniel Ponsky is my Valentine! He's sweet, smart, funny and shares the same opinion as I do, about this holiday. You can check out all of Daniel's stuff including a few of his comedy clips on his myspace page http://www.myspace.com/danielponsky.
Happy Valentine's Day to all of our readers!

-Atomic Bombshell


VALENTINE'S (VD) DAY Daniel Ponsky style

Valentines Day, it's here again. That special day where love is not blind, it's expensive. When Shmoopiness reigns supreme over the wallets of the chosen suckas who have been blessed with that significant other to spoil for an entire day, while the so called single and unlucky are forced to watch uncomfortable displays of affection with a bitter jaded scorn from afar.That's right, hear me now, Valentine's Day is the rape of all holidays! It sneaks up on you like a ninja. It's only a month or so after Christmas. I mean damn, that's a lot of pressure to have to produce after hooking up say, family, friends, co-workers, and not to mention probably the same person you were dating a month ago at Christmas, when you probably kicked down the heavy cheese with extra jalapeño (Translation-Bought an expensive gift for)!





Those sluts in Hollywood don't help by running Zales, and Diamond Brother commercials 24/7/12 either. They subliminally show how people are only in love when they see Diamonds. Why, they don't fucking cure cancer. It's a rock. None the less, the bigger the diamond, the bigger the smile. People smiling, always smiling when they see the diamonds. Never before they see the diamonds, no, only after, which to me says people are only happy after they see diamonds, and any other time in life they are seen smiling, they're faking it. I mean damn, talk about mugging the lower middle class. Why not like push the Hershey Commercials a little more, can you feel me. Chicks dig chocolate, right? It's good and it's cheap.





Not that I'm not down to drop a bill or two on the ladies, but where I come from, you gotta earn that paper. Love is tested, tried and true. It ain't some shit your gonna find buy fluffing it with sparkle and a bottle full of bub. Now get me right, I'm a flower giving motherfucker, but I don't need a holiday to lite that fuse for Miss Delicious. I'm on it! And I ain't so cheap and frugal that I don't get gifts, cause I'm the Santa Claus of sweet pea lovers.





What I'm saying is that Valentine's Day should be a little more of a simple reminder to yourself to take a moment to reflect on the one you love and gain a stronger appreciation for their affection and support. It shouldn't be watered down with materialistic tokens of appreciation which lead to bankruptcy..





So, on those short, subtle, sweet notes, I intend to list a few of my tips on getting through VD Day which might help you from breaking the bank, and showing a loved one how much you really, really care about them. Feel free to add one of your own and see how creative and long the list gets.I believe that taking the time to set the scene for the date, plays more heavy into the emotional response of your loved one, booty call, Vietcong hooker, or whatever.





PICNICS- I love em. Throw in a $2 Frisbee and you have the gift that gives all day long. Throw in a $8 bottle of vino, and you have the concoction for an all night %$^#1 fest. If you don't know how to cook then go to your favorite place to eat(under$20 person) and order the shit to-go. Don't forget the roses. Most gas stations have that Mexican boy or cult member selling em at the corner, at wholesale prices. Tell em Daniel sent you.

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What's Valetines Day Mean To you?

Jaime

Honestly, Valentine's day should be for both parties in the relationship. I don't want all the presents and dining. I would like a card with him writing something nice in it and the both of us cook dinner together. Most importantly, there shouldn't be a holiday where you celebrate how much you love that person. It should be celebrated everyday without materialistic things. This isn't bullshit either.

Robyn

Valentines day is just another day.... Honestly I've never had a had a good one yet! And that goes for with, and without, having a boyfriend. Maybe this year will be better with my new boyfriend!

Jenny

Im single... and valentines day to me is a holiday that two people who care bout each other spend together..... to many people loss sight on what it is really about... its not bout gifts and candy. its about feelings and being with the person that makes u happy....

Ashley

I think valentine's day has grown more than just a day for couples now. its a day to go out and have fun with your single friends. because we all know that the couples will be together, and us single girls need to have fun too. so it's more than just a day for those taken. it definitly is now overrated and everyone acts like its this big holiday. to be honest i'd rather be with the girls at the club! ♥

Lisa

Ok truthfully, i hate valentines day ! I think it is so blown out of proportion. Im not just saying that because i got out of a year and a half relationship, i have always been bitter during this holiday and i don..t know why. I guess maybe because even when your happy you have single friends around you who are lonely and it just makes me feel bad! Hey i guess you can thank hallmark for this one !!

Jacky Joy

Adult Film Star Extraordinaire

if you want my honest opinion about valentines day is that its so overplayed. I have a boyfriend and i still hate it! The only reason i pretend its something special to my boyfriend is so i can get expensive jewelry out of him or an awesome getaway! other then that its just another day!

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Do You Know, Or Are You, This Guy?

Jackie

Lately I have come across an issue I thought was squashed at recess on the play ground in 8th grade........obvious you men still exist. Sorry to all the wonderful, loving , caring fathers, husbands, boyfriends and such out there who are nothing like the following men

Here are the few men in the world which I can not stand.They remind me of guys from high school who thought it was cool to make fun of girls

1. The guy who wants but once he has no longer wants......HE WILL ALWAYS BE EMPTY INSIDE.....at our age its time to get over the chasing game or you'll loose em all

2. The guy who tells his friends he doesn't have a girlfriend or who acts like its an embarrassment to have a girl in his life. WHAT IS WRONG WITH THESE GUYS????

3. The guy who talks shit about the women he dates when he's in public situations. THERE IS NO EXCUSE FOR THIS AND YOU DON"T LOOK COOL.you should be proud of the women you date and talk them up to your friends. Not down.......its not cool and they are a reflection of you.

4. The guy who denies to himself that he is in love......there are so many people who never fall in love.....to deny yourself of that feeling is the worse possible decision.

5. The guy who lies to himself about reality. GUYS WHO ARE YOU LYING TO??? if you say the same lie over and over again to enough people do you eventually believe it?

6. The guy who thinks cheating on his current girlfriend with his ex is OK b/c its his ex.....ARE YOU F-N kidding me??? cheating is cheating

7. The guy who can not understand having sex and not catching feelings. JUST b/c we have sex with you doesn't mean you are held at any higher regard, doesn't allow you to act like and ass, and doesn't mean you can ask us for favors. Nor does it mean we wanna call you all the time, hold your hand, care about where you've been. It doesn't mean you are not able to talk shit about us to your boys and act as if we CARE about you more then we did the day before we had sex. Its may be nice to think that in your head but you know the truth.

and that my friends is my valentines day advice!

xoxo

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What's Your Worst Valentines Day Experience??

Britt

well long story short, he was mad at me because i went to the bar. we were arguing in his car, i got out to start walking away and um bam, the bitch hits me. now, im not talking about a love tap... my effin brain started bleeding and i had surgery on it. fun fun now my life has changed because that ass is insecure. thanks much but hell the doctors didnt think i was going to live and here i am :) they just had to shave my head so now im GI Jane haha i plan on getting wasted on Valentine's day hahaha i am awesome Enjoy :)

Dani M'F'in Diamonds

You want a good story...my last serious relationship...I got outta school early on V-Day because my boyfriend was gonna pick me up at 3pm and take me out into the city for a "night on the town"...it ended up that I waited all night for him, dressed to the nines and all, and never heard from him...a lil before 10pm, when I was getting ready for bed (a girl can't wait forever), I get a call from his mother...he was in jail for DUI and possession of cocaine and she wanted to know if I wanted to go with her to the jail to see what she could do to bail him out...ummm, what?!? Never talked to him since...nice, huh?!

Tiela Marie

I have 2. A few years ago, my boyfriend at the time had planned a suprise valentines evening for us. Unfortunatley, I got stuck at work and had to call to delay seeing him a few hours. He became so upset he wouldn't answer his phone for hours. Finally I got ahold of him to tell him I was coming over. He freaked out because it wasn't on his time schedule... and broke up with me....on valentines day mind you. Not the best way to realize that a man isn't for you. He regretted it later, and tried to apologize but by then I was done. And then there was last year. I was dating a man who I was in love with. Smart, funny, attractive and was more than a boyfriend.. He was also my best friend. We had to do valentines day a day early because he had to work very late on wednesdays and valentines day fell on a wednesday last year. We went to breakfast had this beautiful day together, he also sent roses to my work. I was head over heels. Well, come valentines day I'm at work and receive a call from a number I didn't know. I answer it, and its my boyfriends mentally insane, large, disgusting ex girlfriend, she's calling to tell me that she is at his house right at that moment and that she is sleeping with him... oh and that she found one of my blazers at the house... how nice of her to tell me, right? HA! I called him to ask him about it... he stated that I know her mental history (which she indeed has) and that she's making it up. It just didn't sit well with me... that gut bad feeling. So I did some snooping and I came to find out that he was cheating on me with her. I went to the house to take back my stuff and he tells me she cut my gorgeous blazer in half. At that point, I finally lost it....freaked out on him and dropped his ass. Since that point last year, he's attempted to get me back with no luck.. While he hooks up with her because he's pathetic. And as for me? I realized that god didn't give me anything that I couldn't handle, I still believe in love, and that I really miss.... that blazer.

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Hit The Stage With A B-Boy Stance, The Club on It Like Who's Hottie Is That?

Jess

Lets see I am the most out going, down to earth and fun girl you will ever meet. My guy friends think I am one of them because they can talk to me about anything, I'm not one of those prissy materialistic girls. I always start the convo and I dance when ever possible. I love corny reality TV and I am obsessed with Playboy, I'm trying to be Hef's 4th girlfriend. (ha ha) I am a blond bombshell and I definitely have blond moments but I think thats what makes me unique. Don't catch me when I'm drunk or I will talk your ear off. I think I am histerical, I'm always trying to make people laugh. I am a dare devil and love to do risque' things. I love being spontanious, if a thought pops in my head, you bet with in the next day I'll be doing it.

YES! I'd definitely let her passs as Hef's next girlfriend, she can replace Bridget...I'm a sucker for Kendra so, yes, I occassionally watch the show. Blonde or Brunette this hottie can work it. That's an added bonus. Once every few months you can have her dye her hair and its like you have a whole new girlfriend with the same cool personality. Jess works at the Hooters in Bensalem, and is just another case of my radar gone sour. I always get the waitress who should be working at the local retirement home, rather then Hooters. Jess is seriously hot. Just look at the eyes, and the smile. Judging from her myspace pics, Jess is a fun time. Looks like there's always something going on around her, and she and her girls don't mind being the center of attention as long as they are just out enjoying themselves. A live for the moment type of girl. I wish we could have girls like Jess on every single day. Beautiful, and she's currently attending college, so she must be smart too. Put this one up on a pedestal, fellas. This is the Rookie of the Year for Hotties.

Tip of the Day

Q: Besides staying in, what should a single guy do on Valentines Day?

A: I think a single guy should go out on Valentines day! Him and a couple other single buddies should hit the local hot spot because I'm sure there will be some sexy ladies there who also does not have a Valentine. Who knows if he's lucky maybe he will meet someone who went out for the same reason, hopefully sparks will fly!

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Where My Hotties At, From The Front To Back, Tell Me Are Ya Feelin That?

Kristina

Sorry for the late post today. I had a meeting that kinda ran overboard. Like you care..so anyways, here is the lovely Kristina. This 23 year old hails from Bensalem, and can be found shoving drinks down your throat at the Clubhouse Bar and Grille in Newtown. Seriously, this is why I don't find women. My radars gone completely haywire. The Clubhouse is literally in my backyard, like a 15 minute WALK, and I had no idea they had this level of talent there. In fact, Kristina MAY have been the recipient of my worst pickup attempt ever. I paid with credit and signed the receipt and put my number at the bottom with a "call me" underneath (soooo gay, I know. At least I didn't put hearts or a smiley face). In my drunken stupor, I forgot I already took my receipt. So I grabbed the bar's copy and ripped that up too. Number and all, now leaving no form of payment. Not only was my attempt extremely lame, but then I made her work more, and have to figure out how to print up a new recipt for me to sign. Needless to say I left my number off that one, added some extra tip, and stumbled out. Tequila + Mind Erasers = Bad Pickup Attempts. Kristina likes to spend time hanging with her girls. Her girls are hot too! Plus she's a bartender, which is the ultimate profession for a hottie, because, as I've said before, there's nothing you can do that they haven't seen. I love the eyes on Kristina, and definitely the smile. This is a fun, classy girl who knows how to have a good time. What more could you ask for really?

Tip of the Day

Q: Besides staying in, what should a single guy do on Valentines day?

A: Make the make the most of it and hang out with single friends. There is always something to do even if ur single.

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Ever Since She Can Remember, She's Been Poppin Her collar

Lacey

What has two thumbs and doesn't give a shit about Valentines Day?? This guy!! (pointing thumbs at myself like I'm John Travolta). I don't have to buy ridiculously expensive flowers, or pad Hallmarks bank account, so I guess that's the good part. On the other side of the coin, on the most Romantic day of the year, I'll be punch drunk hurling obscenities at every happy couple I see. Oh, to be young again. Today we have the lovely Lacey. I really dont have to say much, she does a very good job of describing herself. Talented, smart and beautiful...we just have to convince her that popping your collar is not a good idea.

A little bit about me: I'm Lacey! I'm 25 yrs OLD- uhh, can the birthdays stop coming? I'm a retired college cheerleader and a retired hooters girl. I'm currently pouting bc the giants won the superbowl- boo!!! I work for a commercial real estate firm and can't wait to start law school in the fall (fingers crossed). I love adventures- this could be anything from causing mischief at the bar to camping in the mountains. I think smiles (and stilettos) make the world a better place. Being happy has and always will be my number one priority in life. I believe in marriages that last. I love the beach-it cures any problem or anxiety you have! Music also does that, especially punk and emo music! I'm really independent. I've always rathered sleeping alone but then again maybe I haven't found the right person to sleep with. I need to be able to do my own thing. I don't believe in seeking approval from anyone. At 25 I get pleasure from simple things: martini's, stilletos, sushi, work, sucess, submitting law school apps, the gym, the "perfect jeans" and well, I'm sure you can guess the other thing :) I can't stand dirty dishes in the sink, yet I'm kind of messy. When it rains, I love to jump in the puddles and no, I don't care if I mess up my hair...

As far as guys and my single-ness: I've never been in love, yeah I know what you are thinking. My perfect guy is...someone who can be 6 years old again with me, someone who i can never stay mad at, someone who understands that I can't be the "only" thing in your life. I tend to dig the who preppy, surfer look. Yes, I actually am turned on by popped collars. I noticed match didn't list that in their turn on's and off's section, haha. I dig the flip flops thing year round. I'm a sucker for board shorts with a tan line! I like having a drinking partner- whether he wants to do it up in town or be my partner for one of my house's "infamous 90 cup" beer pong tournements. I want a guy who can look at me and tell me I'm wrong when I am. I'm not a princess, I can handle the truth. A little conflict is good for a relationship, it means you can handle it when things aren't always perfect. I want a guy who is secure with himself and the relationship. I will never grill you as to where you've been and with who. Whats the point of a relationship if you need to grill the other person? Trust is always a necessity. Flirt all you want because I know that you are coming home with me at the end of the night, if you didn't want to, you wouldn't - cut and dry. I don't believe in jealousy. Relationships are all about having someone to share your experiences with, if it ever takes away from your own happiness, it's not worth it. To have a sucessful relationship you must first be okay with being alone but then again what do i know, I've never been in love...haha

Sounds complicated, but worth the effort. Plus, I REALLY wanna play in a 90 cup beer pong tournament.

Tip of the Day

Q: Besides staying in, wat should a single person do on Valentine's Day?
A: And on february 15th (the real valentines day celebration) all the single guys should be busting out some fabulous dance moves at the Valentines Day Gala at the Crystal Tea Room in Philly. The proceeds go to CHOP. So if you don't wanna do IT for me...Do IT for the kids!

See, Local Hotties really is for the children. I don't lie.

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