www.PatBurrellforAllStar.com
Tell your friends, and your friend's friends! It's a fun outlook on the Phillies season, and our main goal is to make Philadelphia's Most Valuable Punching-Bag an all-Star for the first time ever!
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Thursday, May 15, 2008
NEW SITE! CHECK IT OUT
Music And Passion Were Always The Fashion At The Copa
Jackie
I first e-mailed Jackie about 6 months ago maybe. I have absolutely no idea why, but somehow she got lost in the mix of random porn emails and actual work emails. Well, it's about time we blessed the world with this beauty. She's only gotten HOTTER as time has gone on. Jackie is 23 years old, and is going to Temple to obtain her bachelors in Science. Now if she gets one of those CSI-type jobs, it'll really be a case of life imitating fiction. Calleigh Duquesne and Natalia Boa Vista ain't got shit on Jackie. Ok, maybe Natalia. I looove Natalia. Her first case would probably be the Doylestown Flasher. This girl is a true down to earth, girl neext door hottie. Jackie works as a hostess at a restaurant in the Northeast which I will now be frequenting as I get drunk on my lunch hour. Nothing says long, hard day at work like a noon vodka and sprite. She tries her best to be a sweetheart, and loves spending time with her friends as they go out on the town to bust a move. I need to learn how to dance, cause women love that shit. This is the type of woman you have to "woo". Bring your A game, or don't even come to the party. I'd travel wide and far to impress this hottie. Let's see what we have to do to land a woman like this...
Tip of the Day
Q: What's your best piece of dating advice for all those single schleps in Philly?
A: Well, my advice for single guys out there would be.... when you approach a girl, ask her questions about herself, don't really talk about yourself unless she asks you a specific question... I know for me I get happy when a guy is interested in hearing about my life and who I am and what my interests are. Also, I can usually tell if the guy honestly cares and wants to get to know me (my type), or if he is faking it to try and take me home with him that night for one thing and one thing only (not my type). 
Click Here to see more pics and dating advice from this hottie!
Wednesday, May 14, 2008
If I Walk Away And Just Let You Leave, You'll Be Stuck in My Head Like A Melody
Laura Elizabeth
I took my Flyers woes and drank them away. I could really care less anymore. I was depressed, not functioning, and I thought to myself...."how can I turn this frown upside down?" A little case of the Laura Elizabeths. Oh yeah boyeeee. I got home from the bar, and found the e-mail with Laura agreeing to be our hottie, and I got all fired up! This is a certified cutie. 19 years old, Mullivan. Laura Elizabeth goes to school at the Art Institute for Interior Design. Maybe when she graduates I'll be her first customer and she can redecorate the interior of my double wide. Dude, it's more space than you think. So not only will she have a pretty cool job, but she also passes the hat test. The hat test is very simple....hot girl puts on said hat and only two things can happen: A. She looks good and you continue on with your day, giving a silent fist pump behind her back, or B. She looks like an asshole and you force her to pay for her own ice cream and leave her with some drippy cone in her hand. Laura Elizabeth is option A. I really, really think you'd be dropping the ball by making this hottie cab it home. So now you can see why my day was turned around....this hottie can put a smile on your face just by flashing that smile of hers. Then I woke up this morning and I got an email...."oh and im taken. put that in there too" Really, dude?
Tip of the Day
Q: What's your best piece of advice for all the single men in Philly?
A: the best piece of advice i have for single guys is not to try so hard. some guys like to think that big things matter and they really dont if that makes any sense. for example; how much money they have, how much they bench press,etc. and a lot of girls dont like big partiers oh and liars. Be honest !!!
Again...Really? I can't lie, embellish, explain that I bench press freakish amounts, while wads of cash fall out of my pockets...then I go out and get wasted? WTF can I do?
Click Here to see more pics and dating advice from this hottie!
Tuesday, May 13, 2008
Cindy Crosby Is A Biiiiiiiitch...Flyguyz In 7
Kelly
Flyguys tonite, boyeeeee! Right here is one of the main reasons I don't go to barbershops anymore, besides of course for the Flowbee they break out on me. Why have some 45 year old pervy guy draped all over me when I can get my head massaged by a beauty like this? It's a no brainer. I didn't even realize that Kelly is from my town, and went to the same high school as me (kinda). This 21 year old beauty hails from Bucks County, y'all. the land of cream and cheese. Beautiful smile and all around hottie, Kelly's responsible for helping the people of Bucks County look beautiful everyday. She's doin a damn good job. Kelly also likes to speak her mind, which she says gets her into trouble everynow and then...but that's what makes life not boring! Unfortunately, this one's engaged, but the premise still applies. How do you pick up a girl like this? Read below.
Tip of the Day
Q: What's your best piece of dating advice for all those single guys in Philly?
A: the best piece of dating advice i got for you single boys is to be romantic but not smothering. take it slow. girls dont like it when i guy falls for them the first day. and be nice to her, no name calling. ok boys?? take care of her.
Monday, May 12, 2008
Analyze This!
Ashley!
Woooohooooo! This weather absolutely sucks! But that doesn't mean we can't still have a great day. I mean, I'm starting my day off with a little bit of Ashley. A true hottie if I've ever seen one. Ashley is studying to be a psychiatrist, so you can't play games with this one. She'll figure 'em out right away and probably blame them on lingering Mommy issues, or fear of abandonment. I'm afraid of abandonment, but that's what happens when your left on a random neighbor's doorstep by your real mother. Then again, I was 20 and probably coulda just walked away, but the house looked sooo big. Ashley's got the total package. Beautiful smile, bangin body, and brains to match. Don't let the blonde hair fool you, this girl is a smarty. When she's not gettin her learn on (weak, I know) she can be found livin it up like a rockstar all across the city. Her friends are just as hot as her too. Tell me that wouldn't be intimidating! Anywho, I'd like to hear how to impress this type of beauty, so I'm gonna sit back, relax, and let myself go....
Tip of the Day
Q: Ashley, what's your best piece of dating advice for all those single Philly guys?
A: My best piece of dating advice for the single men would be to not lead a woman on, if you're not interested you should let her know instead of making her think you will call her . Another thing , guys like to play games. It's okay in the beginning to mess with her head, like not call for 2 days, blow her off one night, but to not talk to her for a week than decide to call her and expect her to jump and go out with you is ridiculous. She will end up thinking you're a complete jerk and you'll end up losing her. The best thing you can do is be yourself and everything else falls into place.
See, dude. She's allll over the games. Knock it off.
Click Here to see more pics and dating advice from this hottie!
Sunday, May 11, 2008
Happy Mother's Day
I'd like to send a little shout out to all the moms out there. You put up with way more shit than you probably should, and it's amazing you haven't put a few of us in the microwave yet. I certainly give my mom her share of grief, and somehow she still loves me. I think she considers me like a pet...that unconditional love (even if my dog just shit on the rug, she'll still pet her). Otherwise, I can't really explain it. There's a lot of talent that goes into being a mother. We give you a lot of shit just because you care, and sometimes we mistake that caring for nagging. We do realize your just lookin out for whats best for us, and we really do appreciate you. Just telling you that everyday would give you a big head, so we like to only be truthful one day a year. The other 363 (minus your bday and christmas on a leap year) we just like to test you and see what we can actually get away with. Normally, it's not much.
In short, We love you, Moms. Not many people are wired to put up with a lot of bullshit, yet you pull it off gracefully, and beautifully too. Your like real life TV stars (that crazy Roseanne!). There's a lot of women out there who do the whole single mother thing, and I find it amazing to be able to balance a lifestyle and a child. If I had a beer right now, (I'd be an alcoholic) I'd raise my glass to you all. Honestly, I'm trying to put this whole thing into words and I really can't. I mean, you guys do so much for us that can't even be explained or paid back.
In short, Moms...we love you. We may be assholes sometimes and we may push buttons, but we're only doing what's best for you. If we didn't occasionally test you, no one would, and your life would be a bore. At least thats what we think. If you didn't have us, you'd probably be out enjoying hobbies like rock climbing and bocce ball. So thanks, Moms. Thanks for everything. Today is your day and I'll pour out some Mimosa for ya.
Click Here to see more pics and dating advice from this hottie!
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