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Monday, November 17, 2008

She Thinks My Tractor's Sexy...It's Really Turns Her On


So we get this email on Friday....the norm...I wanna be on Philly Hotties, my friend thinks I'd be good for it yadda yadda. It's got pictures attached, so I'm like, "all right, let's see what happens" Now, let me explain that the emails we normally get are from husbands who are trying to surprise their wives and want us to put them up with no permission from the wife. Or it's a guy who has a crush on his local bartender and hopes to make her mildly famous for a day. I open all these emails with reluctance, somehow wondering what could be the issue with this one. When I opened Jenna's pictures, my jaw dropped. This girl is smokin hot. Easily a 9. Like so hot, I'd marry her right now and change my whole lifestyle as to not piss her off. So now I'm interested enough to read the email, and I find, this girl has a bright future too! I think we've hit the user submitted email right on the head. Hollllly crap this girl is hot. Stunning. Brunettes do it for me. And she's a dreamer. So let's see what this little Bensalem hottie has to say for herself....

i danced for 17 years at a local studio mostly ballet. im currently attending the art institute of philadelphia for fashion merchandising and visual marketing. Ive been single...well forever! but im convincing myself that im not a mutant im just waiting for the right guy! i put hot sauce on almost everything! and nothinggg is too spicy for me! i love to bake! i make the best cakes! i hope to one day open my own dress boutique, bakery and flower shop! I am working as a nanny right now its in interesting job never a boring day with twin 2 yr olds to chase around. the cheese cake factory is my favorite restaurant...but i dont think ive ever even had the cheesecake!i love getting dressed up and going out but sometimes i want my victorias secret sweatpants and a will ferrell movie! country music is my favorite and kenny chesney is the love of my life =)

Whoa..there's a lot going on here. And it's all wrapped up in the beautiful package. Did Christmas come early? I don't know what I like more about Jenna. The brains, beauty, or the future ahead of her. Ok, I know what I like best and it's all visual. I'm a guy, we're visual creatures. But she stole my heart when she said she loves country music. It's like the perfect ending to my redneck fantasy. Imagine the first date, we can go tractor riding, shoot guns, and drink Pabst blue ribbon! Whoever said dreams can't come true never met his hottie and my redneck family. She's also a dancer....which bodes well for the future. Specifically...she's always gonna have a slammin figure. Plop on top that gorgeous face, and we're in hottie heaven. Emails have become that much more fun! And she's single....which I'm sure all of us are more than willing to help her out with. Right, fella? So hop on the old John Deere, grab your sweetest set of cowboy boots, and you too can try to impress this hottie. She's absolutely stunning.

Tip of the Day

Q: Jenna, Describe ur dream first date for us. Where is it. What do u do, how does the guy act etc...

A: well first of all..the guy would pick me up! i dont know whats with guys asking u to meet them all of the sudden i know gas prices are still a little high but come on! then we would go somewhere where you can actually talk and get to know eachother, not the movies guys! save that for the 3rd date! i think dinner is the perfect first date..somewhere different though, not your local applebees. i love italian food so maybe somewhere around the italian market! then maybe walk around the city afterwards. On the first date i would hope the guy would be outgoing but still polite and being himself!!! im obviously interested if i agreed to go out with you, dont act like someone else! and not nervous! or at least hide it so i dont feel uncomfortable! and door opening is a must and that should last wayyy past the first date! most importantly try to keep conversation going so i dont feel like im yapping ur ear off just to avoid an awkward silence! and most importantly dont text or call me as soon as u get home! make me think about u a little all girls will agree that theyll be more interested if the guy isnt overly eager! and if in 3 days you are still thinking about me send me some flowers! cala lillies please =)

I imagine a dinner date with Jenna would go like this : ME: "ummmmm, wow, hmm ok. Your pretty. Teehee" Jenna: "Seeya, freakshow" Me: "ok byeee"