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Wednesday, October 31, 2007

Douchebag Of The Week...we'll call him...STAN*

***Names have been changed or altered to protect the innocent and also to not endorse this douchies fledgling career. ... PS. hes on the right in the picture!


Douchebag in BLUE FONT


----------------- Original Message -----------------

From: stanDate: Apr 26, 2006 5:32 PM

Hi FRIEND OF LOCAL HOTTIES, I'm Stan, (pronounced Stan) a TV/Film writer-producer in Los Angeles... Hopefully you've checked out my last film by now -- "***REDACTED**" which I wrote & produced -- Here's the trailer --> www.wt**** http://www.w**** more on me... -->**** http://www.s*******.com/ (yes, I used to be an actor) Before becoming a scribe, I plied my trade in front of the cameras as an actor and one of the stars of the CBS television series "Tour of Duty" three seasons. I'm about to direct my 1st film at Lions Gate called "M***ood" with Mos Def in Atlanta... Back in the day I also produced the absolute worst show in the history of television... no joke/don't ask. I assure you this is not bragging or self promotion, just hoping to establish a degree of legitimacy... With all of the liars on line hopefully you'll understand. stan@s*****ter.comAre you open to friendship/networking?

----------------- Original Message -----------------

From: FOLH Date: Apr 26, 2006 6:31 PM

Well, Stan, I don't know how you missed me in LA.. Um, I think your myspace page needs a little love! Out of curiousity, how did you even find me on myspace?You make movies, do you? Well, that's perfect, because I want to be in a movie. Although, I'd love a television show. Well, I hope all is well in Tinsel Town, USA. Stay Good & Be Bad

----------------- Original Message -----------------

From: stan Date: Apr 26, 2006 10:02 PM

Let's speak by phone. What's your number?

----------------- Original Message -----------------

From: FOLH Date: Apr 26, 2006 8:15 PM

no offense, but i don't know u to give u my number! gonna have to b via computer for now!

----------------- Original Message -----------------

From: stan Date: Apr 27, 2006 1:22 PM

Did I miss your call too? lol

----------------- Original Message -----------------

From: FOLH Date: Apr 27, 2006 11:38 AM

ur funny! nope, just a bz kid.

----------------- Original Message -----------------

From: stan Date: Apr 27, 2006 1:52 PM

yes... we all are.

----------------- Original Message -----------------

From:FOLH Date: Apr 27, 2006 2:54 PM

why don't u have anything up on your page?

----------------- Original Message -----------------

From: Stan Date: Oct 30, 2007 9:16 AM

leave your numer again...

----------------- Original Message -----------------

From: Friend of Local Hotties(FOLH) Date: Oct 30, 2007 2:34 PM

leave my number again? i never left it before. boy, you are a dedicated fan, huh? lol...

----------------- Original Message -----------------

From: Stan Date: Oct 30, 2007 1:36 PM

Well now i don't feel so bad. I was embarrassed to say that I'd lost it. By the way... a fan of WHOM?

----------------- Original Message -----------------

From: FOLH Date: Oct 30, 2007 2:40 PM

apparently, a fan of mine the way you pop up periodically!! :)

----------------- Original Message -----------------

From: Stan Date: Oct 30, 2007 1:49 PM

Someone who writes occassionally to say hello could hardly be considered a "fan". Let's explore this... you are popular in Omaha... My movies are seen by millions around the world. I guess you're right. It makes sense that I would be a fan of yours.

HOLY SHIT!... I did some research and he's completely correct. He did produce the absolute worst show ever. It's called "Homeboys in Outer Space" Yes, that's really the title. I'll pause while you laugh your ass off. Homeboy, are you actually from outer space?? Is this how you pick up chicks? Write for our site, Stan. We seriously could use this level of comedy on here. But why, oh why, would you not mention you hung out with Bobby Brown. I mean, I realize it's your prerogative, but did you follow his every little step? Get a life, homo. I believe your not lying. I just actually don't care about your shitty television/movie background. Hey Stan, Are you open to shutting the hell up/not killing the male species? Oh you are? I must have lost your number...Did we miss your call?? HAAHAHAAH Douchebag .

Click Here to see more pics and dating advice from this hottie!

It's The Great Hottie, Charlie Brown

Stacey Metal

We here at Local Hotties enjoy the fact that there's more than one flavor of woman out there. And this is certainly a different flavor. We present to you...the Metal chick. Stacey is a 23 year old hottie from Philly who loves going to every metal and hard rock show in the tri-state area. She loves hanging out with her sister at Metal bars, and she's big into traveling and modeling. Oh, I mentioned her sister...they're identical. There's two beauties who look like this! But we'll try to save that for another day. This hottie can out party your bitchasses by a loooong shot. Just look at the pictures....brass knuckles, the way, there's nothin hotter than a hottie who looks natural holding a Jack bottle. And she prefers Jager. We're a drinking match made in heaven.....hell??! Oh Your God! (that's what my atheist rocker buddy tells me!!)

"The things that I believe make me unique are that I am very open with my feelings and out-going. I am very accepting and open-minded. My twin sister and I, together, could have fun anywhere we go. We could have fun at an insurance seminar!! Most people say that we never fail to light up the room when we walk in and that we are a lot of fun to be around."

So in other words, she's a beautiful, fun loving person. Life of the party who's willing to give you (jager)her heart and her friendship. But once you screw it up, (Cue Slayer music) she'll go metal on your ass. And she looks like she knows how to handle herself in a (jager fueled) bar fight. Plus as a bonus, I've been to insurance seminars...and NEVER EVER have I seen a hottie like this. It's all 45 year old men with shitty suits and penny loafers (no jager). I scour the room lookin for a fine hottie to settle up next too. Once...just once I saw a hot one. So I quit my job. Mine was mortgages though,....not insurance. Same deal, different daddy. Stacey is definitely an orignial a good way. I love bringing new flavors to the table. That's what life's all about.

Tip of the Day

Q: Whats the maximum age difference you feel is appropriate when dating a Hottie?

A: I would say that the maximum age difference I would accept would be early to mid thirties.

Click Here to see more pics and dating advice from this hottie!

Tuesday, October 30, 2007

Bo Knows That Hotties Did It... Cash, Jewelry and Homes, Yeah Hotties Did It


Fumbles.....This is a hottie. I want no complaints out of you. RJ is a 22 year old hottie who recently graduated from West Chester with a degree in communications. You can find her partying the weekend away in the city, but suring the week she's a corporate meeting planner. I don;t know what that is either , but I'm sure she looks hot doing it. Ok, so so far RJ's writ eup sounds very blah blah and very ordinary...then BAM! I'm going to mention here that this hottie is the hottest female athlete in the world. Behind only MAYBE Heather Mitts. RJ is a semi-pro beach volleyball player. She's considered the Anna Kournika of Volleyball....ehhhhh. Anna's kinda beat up lookin anymore, plus she's with Enrique Iglesias so I'm sure I've got no shot. Can we go with Maria Sharapova....or why not just the Heather Mitts of volleyball. Whatever, I'm proposing. I'm sending thtis to sports illustrated and the four letter network....because I seriously think we found the next great talent. The talent's evident here, but can she play volleyball is the question? I'm sure she holds her own. She can hold mine...(shakes head in disbelief that I said that). RJ, the rock I give you won't be as big as Diddy's, (who RJ's partied with) but its filled with hope. Hope is all you have when you don't have cash, homey. Or at least I 'd try to convince her of that. Seriously, go try to spend hope. It sucks.

Tip of the Day

Q: Whats the maximum age difference you feel is appropriate when dating a Hottie?

A: I don't think there should be a set cut off age - I think if I meet a guy, (younger or older), as long as we have the same maturity level and a steamy chemistry going I don't see how 5-10-15 years should hold you back from being happy and having fun.

Gratuitous bikini shot. Thats her in action. Yeah....she's good.

Click Here to see more pics and dating advice from this hottie!

Monday, October 29, 2007

This Is Why, This Is Why I'm Hot

Jessenia Vice

Marnee! Thanks again, beautiful! Jessenia Vice is a 23 year old student and ER Nurse. And if you haven't guessed by now, she models too. Look at this hottie. I can;t find a flaw. This latina hottie is currently in nursing school. I don't know what it is about Latina women, but I absolutely love them. It might be the attitude, or the "Ayyy Papi!" They say the way to a man's heart is through his stomach....that's not true outside of Italians. It's through his ears (I should know, mine are big, ok huge)...and hearing "Hola, ayyy, te amo"...anything followed by Papi makes this little Scottish-Irish fella melt. It also doesn't hurt when they look like Jessenia. The key to this hotties heart is to appreciate her. She wants a man who's aware of the fine package of beauty, brains, and humor that has been ass-embled here. Serisouly, I've looked for a flaw for like the last 15 minutes and I can't find one.....not one. This hottie is marriage material. I think her one flaw would probably be that she's not willing to marry a Scottish-Irish website owner with pasty skin and a passion for latina women. Smooooooooth. Keep your eyes peeled. I sense big things are gonna be happening for this hottie. I'm SURe this isn't the last place you'll see her. Although, I'm also sure you WON'T be seeing this on her resume.

Tip of the Day

Q: Whats the maximum age difference you feel is appropriate when dating a Hottie?

A: 10! Over 10 is pushin it, but eww it can work seen it happen for my grandparents and they ware still happy married. I definitely think older men appreciate their women alot more, especially if they are younger than them.

Click Here to see more pics and dating advice from this hottie!

Saturday, October 27, 2007

Atomic Bombshell's Hollywood Interview

Ashley Hamilton

The other day, I got to ask a few questions to Comedian/Actor, Ashley Hamilton who has dated many of Hollywood's most beautiful creatures. Not only is he a very funny Comedian, he is also MAGNIFICENT to look at! (No, I'm not crushing or anything!) You can catch Ashley doing stand-up, all over Los Angeles. Please check his myspace page for upcoming dates!

AB: What's your best approach to get a woman to go out with you?
AH: Wanna fuck? Kidding, wanna have sex? Make em laugh!

AB: What's your opinion about sex on the first date?

AH: Big fan, just not anal on the 1st date! Define date!? If she's gonna have sex with you on the 1st date, she will do it with somebody else!

AB: If you want to see that person again, how long do you wait before you call?

AH: 5 seconds, Call who! I have A.D.D. What's her name again?! Whatever feels natural...

AB: Texting vs. calling? Which is better?

AH: Neither. Camping out in front of their house, that way there is no mixed messages..

AB: What was your worst date ever?
AH: 0ct 10th 2006, horrible hair day, car broke down, I was constipated since my other worst date Sep 23 2006, but that's another date! Seriously, pick a marriage! ****

-Atomic Bombshell

***Guys, so you know...this guy knows what he's talkin about. He's been married to Shannon Doherty AND Angie Everhart.....DUDE!! ANGIE EVERHART!!!! Enough Said.

Click Here to see more pics and dating advice from this hottie!

Atomic Bombshell's Anatomically Correct Dating Advice

Dear Atomic Bombshell,

I have been dating this girl for about 2 months. She is one of the hottest girls that I have ever dated. We see each other about once a week and talk/text/email each other every day. Lately we have been doing the sleep over thing, too. She hasn't brought up anything about a relationship. When she introduces me to friends, she uses my name instead of saying "This is my boyfriend or my guy." I was just wondering how to bring up the relationship thing or is it too soon? I'm not really good at signals and this kind of thing. How do I know that it's the right time?

Dear Mike,

If things are going well, you communicate everyday and feel good about talking to her, I think it's safe to have the "where do you feel this is going" talk. You said that you are seeing each other regularly, it appears to me, that you are in fact, on the road to something bigger. You say it's been 2 months and she is talking to you every day and seeing you once a week, I feel you have nothing to worry about. Trust me, if she was really interested in dating other men, she would not spend that much of her time being in touch with you. I think you should relax. It sounds like it's going great!

Atomic Bombshell

Click Here to see more pics and dating advice from this hottie!

Friday, October 26, 2007

Philly Hotties Got 'Em Scared In The Club


Every once in a while we like to profile a different type of Hottie. Laura is a professional model and a business organizer/personal assistant. She's 27 years old and......a mother of two. Certifiable Milf here. I'm curious to figure out how a single mother of two can have all these activities. I can't lie...I would never be able to be a single mother. First off, I'm not a woman, and second....I can barely control myself. I know people my age who pissed there pants multiple times this year. She's also inked up, and loves showing off her tattoos, although I'm getting the impression we may not be seeing all of them anytime soon...Listen to her explain it.

I am a 27 year old single mother with 2 absolutly beautiful little girls! I am a business organizer/Personal Assistant for Toner Fencing Company LLC. and a model. I have been modeling for the last 3 years for various companies. I have had the absolute pleasure of working with high fashion, Motorcycle Magazines, Local Night life papers and other promotions and shoots. You can find me on, Front Cover of FASTLANE BIKER magazine (October 2007), Front Cover of TheNIghtLIfeSociety Page twice, ChopperExpo Calender 2008, Got 2nd runner up in the Miss Ink America Contest, Mrs. Congeniatlity for Miss MotorSports 2007, more covers books and calenders coming up soon and next year! I adore the modeling it is my vacation from my busy life, when I get in ront of a camera I forget the world around me and I am in that moment. I am a proud parent who loves her kids with all that I am they are my life and the reason that I succeed they are what I live for! I am blunt and honest about majority of all my feelings (im a woman something I have to save for myself! 8^) ) I have a big heart and I love to smile and laugh! I find the light in all dark situations! If we can t always find the silver lining in every cloud I feel life would be miserable. I would rather be happy and enjoy what life brings my way!

Look at all the awards, and accolades. Hottie MILF! That's like winning the lottery and a pot of gold on the same day! I'm certainly impressed. Look at the answer too! this Hottie really took her time to answer it...SO READ IT!! Oh and apparently MILf is not in the Microsoft word vocabulary.

Tip of the Day
Q: How can a guy become the pursuee and not the pursuer?
I truly can tell you this is a question that I could run around in my head. Say a million answers to asking for something perfect but in truth this is what I feel is good for me! When you go up to a woman remember that she is just that a woman....if you treat a woman with repect and consideration....that will be worth more than complementing how hot she is! I am a old style woman opening up doors, sitting down after she has, standing when she gets up, waiting to dig into your food until she has taken a bite. When she talks to you don't just nod your head and pretend to hear her. Listen....and let her know that you have heard her, that means more than most men know! When you are around your buddies, let her feel that you see her, hold her hand through the crowd, treat her with respect around those closest to you and that will earn you alot with a woman! But most important is honesty, if you start with a lie you have to build on a lie, let her know who you are not what you want her to think that you are! Becasue the truth will always come out so just start with the honesty! A woman will look more toward the one who truly wants to know her and all of who she is. Someone she can feel safe but vonerable with. Knowing that what she thinks feels and says matters! To me these few things are some key things in getting the woman that you want!

Click Here to see more pics and dating advice from this hottie!

Thursday, October 25, 2007

If Your A Local Hottie, Put Your Hands Up!


Surfer girls hold a special spot in my heart. I guess its due to the fact that they wear bikinis and typically have smokin hot bodies. Lisa is no exception. This 20 year old hottie is also a dance instructor and used to be a dancer for the Philadelphia Wings......Hell, I'll let her explain it. Oh, AND she can play a mean game of flip cup. Probably outdrink your pathetic little ass, Wendy Whiner.

My name is Lisa Im 20 years old from Ridley im 5"1 ..104 pounds. I am a professional dancer for the Philadelphia Dance Company, in 2005-2006 i danced for the Philadelphia Wings Lacrosse. I am also a dance instructor at a local studio. I am in school for cosmetology and am almost licensed! I live for the summer time and love to surf. I have been modeling for about 2 years now and i absolutely love it. I do promotion and print work mostly. I drive a eclipse spyder which is my new obsession! I am so out going and crazy my friends think its impossible to hang out with me and not laugh! Oh and on the random note im petrified of the dark and bugs!

Tip of the Day

Q: How can a guy become the pursuee and not the pursuer?

A: HmM, I would deff. have to say confidence. If i guy comes up to talk girls can usually read him. If he is confident it kinda shows he will be interesting and fun to get to know. If he comes up and isn't confident and he is shy, then you know there will probably ALOT of awkward silences in that date! and that tends to make girls uncomfortable. So remember guys all you need is CONFIDENCE!! But DO NOT be overly confident or conceited that's a big no no !

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Wednesday, October 24, 2007

Thw One Thing I Wish...I Wish A Hottie Would.

Kombat Barbie

Holy Shit..Holy Shit .... Hoooooooooooly Shit! I'm not really allowed to curse on this site...but Holy Shit. I'll break the rules on this one. Kombat Barbie owns a tanning salon and lives in Philly. I guess they can take that ugliest city poll and shove it up their most likely ugly asses. Hot people don't create shit that judges how hot other people are. They win that shit. I should know...I have a website that judges hot people. Do the math, Einstein. I've done my share to show this city has beautiful people inside and out. We're doing a goddamn service here. how many guys are shy and don't hit on the hot girl? Guess don't know the number because you can't count people who don't hit on you. Right now there's some guy sitting in his cubicle/mom's basement...reading this....taking notes. He's setting out to be a bolder, better person. Ok, I'm exaggerating, but maybe we can help some people. Maybe we asked a girl to be hottie of the day when she was having a rough day....maybe we lifted her spirits for ten minutes. I've learned something from this site....every one percieves beauty differently. Some people find Kombat Barbie hot...well...most people. Other people find that nerdy looking girl in the library hot. Either way...the advice these women give out is the real key. It's an inside advantage to picking them up. Not everyone gets this kind of inside info. I've turned women down from being on this site, because I didn't feel their answer was genuine enough. Travel and Leisure can shove their thumbs up their asses all day and say we're ugly. I've got about 130 women who prove otherwise. So screw you, Travel & Leisure. I may not be the "prettiest" person in the country, but I've got what everyone in this city is born with....pride and passion. It's a passion to love our city, love our sports teams...passion to stand up and yell... "EVERYBODY HITS!! WOOOOOHOOO" without worrying about looking retarded. Ever go to Buffalo and find someone who says..."Oh shit, I'm so happy I left Philly." Probably not. They probably opened a bar that represents Philadelphia. I'm proud to be a Philadelphian, and I'm proud to announce to the world that we are overflowing with beautiful women. And I'm proud that we'll tell you how it is, no sugarcoating it. Maybe I should calm down and just be happy that we finally won something....I need a cheesesteak and a Lager. Eff you, Travel and Leisure. I've got your vote right here. So thank you Kombat Barbie, for combatting the negative image of this city. Apparently, they didn't get her vote for their little poll.

Tip of the Day

Q: How can a guy become the pursuee and not the pursuer?

A: if you want to win a girls heart, you have to make her laugh. Girls want a guy that will make them smile. Its not who has the most money, or the nicest things, its someone who they can call their best friend in the end. Someone they can feel comfortable around and be able to talk about anything. Someone she can be herself with. Always tell her she is beautiful, and always make her feel special, and treat her like the princess that she... remember money can't buy love, but if you give a girl your heart, you may just get hers in return...i kno that soudss cheesy lol but i am more of a romantic lol

Kombat Barbie...thanks so much for your help today. This woman really is gorgeous...and she busts her ass to look this beautiful. She's alocal lingerie and commercial model. She's also been in a movie. A serioous business sense all wrapped up in a package like this. Lovely.

Click Here to see more pics and dating advice from this hottie!

Tuesday, October 23, 2007

I Ain't Never Ran From A Hottie, And I Damn Sure Ain't About To Pick Today To Start Running

Kara Allison

I was always taught to never trust a guy with two first names. Like Billy Bob, or Ray Allen. I'm going to assume that the same logic doesn't apply to this hottie. She looks trustworthy. She has an innocent bring her home to the parents innocent, and watch her impress the family. Oh, did I mention Kara's a Hooters girl? Take a minute and let that sink in. Ok, good? Great! Sullivan...this one's for you. Blonde hair, blue eyes, and she knows how to use those eyes. Really, just look at the pics. Her eyes reveal almost as much as that shirt. Just a mild observation. Not only is Kara a modern Beauty, but she's a braniac as well. Very smart, and very intuitive. If you don;t know what intuitive means, look it up. I'm apparently not intuitive and I'm not a hundred percent sure I know what it means. Fumbles, does this hottie beat Lo from the Hills? I'd rather not do this hottie any injustice. Kara Allison....get down with yo' bad self....word.

My name is Kara and I'm from the King of Prussia area. I just recently turned 21 years old so I'm legally allowed out and causing trouble. I've been dancing since the age of 5 and attended college for awhile in NYC as a dance major. I'm now trying to make it in the big world of dance! I do everything from jazz, hip hop, ballet, tap, modern, salsa... you name it I do it! Hopefully you will see me dancing behind Justin Timberlake one day in his music video but for now you can see me at the local bar being a dance floor whore. I dream big and have many to strive for. Art is also a passion of mine. I love going out in old city or Manayunk or I'm just as content staying home and watching a movie or curling up with a good book. I'm a hooters girl at day and dance teacher at night. I absolutely love sports and support my Philadelphia teams 100%. I'm ALWAYS smiling and love to laugh. Keep an open mind and don't take anything for granted. I am a strong person but sometimes shy when first meeting you. After that, watch out! You scared? You suicidal?...Only in the morning. Spending money is not a hard task for me. Genuine people stand out. I love my friends and they love me for who I am, I always take it one step too far! Quality of friends is more important than quantity. Hopefully moving to NYC or LA?? in the near future. I try and live by 'I would rather take a chance than wonder what could have been.'

Tip of the Day

Q: How does a guy become the pursuee and not the pursuer???

A: Guys, this always keeps my attention. If you are out at a bar or club and you see a cute girl... don't just stand there and look at her, go up and make conversation! Although, please refrain from cheesy pick up lines and asking for her number right away, just ask if you can buy her another drink. I don't like when a guy is intimidated, confidence is key! After that, start some kind of convo that includes asking her a little about herself, hold back on the private questions if I just met you, that will turn me off because you obv don't know your boundaries. Tell me something about yourself that includes a unique goal or hobby, something I will want to know more about and throw a joke in there somewhere so I know you have a personality and a sense of humor. Keep the convo short and sweet and then go out on the dance floor and show me you know how to have a good time... most likely I will follow because I want to know more!
Fellas, you're oh so welcome. We've outdone ourselves again. We rule. Thanks again Kara!

Click Here to see more pics and dating advice from this hottie!

Monday, October 22, 2007

Local Hotties, That's A Brand Name Like Pepsi. I Stand Behind It, I Guarantee It

Brenda Lynn aka Jerzey Gem

Ohhhh Boy. This is a woman. When Jerzey walks by, straight men's jaws drop and gay men yell out weird shit like "Fierce!", and "Work it, Sister!" Me, however, my jaw drops, my palms sweat and I mutter things like "whooooa" Not too attractive. You can see Jerzey in the new Jay Z and Pharell video, "Blue Magic", riding in the red Bentley with Pharell. This hottie is a type of sexy that you don't run into everyday. I mean package. You can check out Jerzey's website, for more pictures and daily updates of her. Trust me, it's definitely worth a look. I can't get over the body. It's heaven sent. C'mon...Jay Z gave her the thumbs up, and he's got Beyonce! Brenda is a professional model, who's been seen in many magazines, and photo spreads. She's recently been a cover model for Show magazine, and is featured in MMA magazine. I need to find me a hottie like this. Where do you go about doing that? The club, or do I just walk the streets in hopes of finding a random photoshoot going down? I'm stumped. I love Latina women. This girl can head out to the club and EASILY be the hottest woman in there. I think Jerzey is what I consider "problem hot". Meaning she's so hot, that when you go out with her, there's really gonna be a problem with men and women staring. So you better always bring your A-game with you.

Tip of the Day

Q: How can a guy become the persuee instead of the persuer?

A: How can a guy become the pursuee instead of the persuer? A man sometimes can forget the small details that can set them apart. Being less aggressive is always more. A glance and smile instead of a stare...makes us wonder...Wondering is good..All in all women are the predators just sit and tease..she will come..:)

Click Here to see more pics and dating advice from this hottie!

Saturday, October 20, 2007

Dear Atomic Bombshell,

When I was 2 years old my grandparents arranged and paid for the adoption of an estranged newborn baby, by a couple who are close friends of our family. I have 9 boy cousins on my mother’s side of the family, but in reality we are more like brothers. Elizabeth grew up with all of us like she was part of our family, like a cousin. We had an amazing and close childhood, but life took us all in our separate directions, as it usually does. .
I hadn’t seen Elizabeth in three years, and when I went to her wedding I remember being floored by how stunningly beautiful she had become. She was no longer the wide-eyed tomboy with scuffed knees who would do anything on a triple-dog-dare. Although she was a star player on the men’s Lacrosse and Ice Hockley team at her college, she still managed to turn a room around when she walked into it. In her spare time between full-contact athletic games she managed to be elected Valedictorian of her class – allowing her to continue her education towards a Masters degree at the Pennsylvania Academy of Fine Arts.
Elizabeth moved to Washington DC to be close to her husband’s new job. Two more years passed before I saw her again at my cousins wedding, one week ago. She was alone. I was alone. Like we were in high school again, we immediately became each others back-up dates. We had a beach house for the weekend and all the cousins hung out and got drunk and caught up on each others lives. Elizabeth and I took a walk on the beach and she unloaded the hardships of her marriage on me like a ton of bricks. Her husband had turned into something of a dick after then got married, and to make matters worse he hadn’t touched her in five months. When I hugged her she burst into tears. This is the girl who knocked out the Quarterback of her College football team with one square punch to the jaw. The slightest bit of sincerity and human touch broke her like glass. For the rest of the weekend we were inseparable. It was like we were kids again at the beach, summer in full swing, just trying to stretch the days out forever.
Elizabeth made plans to come see me in Philly the next week while she took classes right up the street from my apartment. It was so easy it couldn’t be helped. She was hiding from her life in DC with her husband, and I knew it, but I didn’t fight it. Saturday night she came into the city for a bachelorette party and on Sunday she came over to my apartment. We went out and had one of the best Sunday afternoons of our lives. We forgot that what we were both thinking was wrong on so many levels. She slept over. But this time we weren’t 12 years old in a tent in the back yard, no, this time we were both old enough to know what that feeling was in the pit of our stomachs. I kissed her and she moved into me like it was always meant to happen. We kissed and held each other and talked about everything and nothing until the sun came up. It felt like home.
How could something that is so wrong, ever end up right? This girl is like family to me, and I’m giving her another reason to give up on her marriage. My family and her family are quite religious. Her father was my bible professor in high school and he played basketball in college with father. Because of their Christian beliefs, divorce is not an option to my family. Elizabeth was well on the road towards divorce when she showed up to my cousins wedding alone, but to anyone, now it looks like I’m to blame.
Elizabeth was always expected to marry one of the cousins – everyone hoped that she would become officially part of her unofficial family, but she didn’t. Now we’re at a point where I don’t know how people will react if this gets out. It’s completely conceivable that both of our entire families will be ecstatic at the idea of Elizabeth finally being a true relation, but it’s also completely conceivable that I’ll be chastised and condemned by everyone for making Elizabeth’s struggling marriage virtually unsalvageable.
Am I a scumbag? I know she’s vulnerable right now, and I know she’s in dire need of someone to reassure her of all the things that her husband had begun to make her doubt. Am I wrong for being that rock for her to hold on to, even if in doing so I become the very rock that has her pinned against a hard place?

Dear Andrew,

Scumbag? Hmmmmm.. If you do the right thing, No. What you really need to do is put your own needs aside and just continue to be there for her. Be her rock (as you put it). She needs to find her own way through this and no one can really make her come to a conclusion except her. You should definitely stand by whatever decision she makes and not try to sway her in anyway. With all the pressures of family, religion, etc, something like this could take months. Be the one person who doesn't make her feel pressured. Even if you think the husband is a total tool, don't push her into anything she is not ready for. Be prepared for an extremely emotional time, so try not to get too entangled in the moment. I just thinks it's best to continue supporting her and try not to make any waves in the family until she makes her final decision. I know it's easier said than done. If you truly care for her, you will do the right thing.

Atomic Bombshell.

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Friday, October 19, 2007

Ohhhh Crank That, Local Hottie!

Nicky Kennedy

Ladies and Yenta-men, we have a winner! Nicky is an 18 year old psychology major (with a minor in dance at West Chester University. Nicky's developing her own website for her modeling gigs, promotional shoots, and other various hottie stuff that I know nothing about. To me having your own website means throwing up pictures of really hot girls and whining about why you can't get them. She also hosts her own radio show on, which you can catch Tuesday and Sunday nights at 11...aka your internet porn time. This hottie's 5'3.5" and 108 pounds, which combined with a dancer's workout routine creates a god damned hot body. If you don't believe me just look! In her spare time (really..she's got spare time?), she like to get all decked out and enjoy the finer points of the city with her friends. She's also a writer. I'm gonna request that she writes a poem for our website entitled "Hot? You're Not." Maybe not that exactly, but a poem about our website would make our *ahem*..hearts skips a beat. She can outdance any girl...any day. SABRINA....we've got a challenger! Yes..hottie dance off. I'll bribe a DJ and scam a bar, and we'll get liquor and wings and have a battle. Supersoak That! Thats my new mission. Oh, did I mention she's a die hard Eagles fan. I can't get over the Hugh Douglas jersey. I thought I was the only person who still rocked a Hugh Jersey. I guess I can share as long as the other party wearing said jersey is a hottie. That's legal jargon. Check out Nicky's website.......

Tip of the Day

Q: What type of body do your prefer on a guy?

A: I prefer a built but not body builder type of guy. I like a guy with a good upper body, with big arms to hold me close =] He can't be in better shape than me though !! I like a guy with cut abs but nothing overboard, one thing I hate more than anything is a guy who takes longer to get ready than I do!!

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Thursday, October 18, 2007

I'm A Local Hottie And My Eyes Are Green, I Wear More Gold Than The Man On A-Team


Philly girls are back! ROAR! This is Pasqualina. 25 year old hotttie (with an extra t) hailing from Doylestown, Pa. Oh, they done growed em so good out here in the burbs, Jed. Seriously, it must be something in the water cause the girls out here have got it all. This hotties a dental assistant on her way to dental hygiene she can handle an expensive tool ..OH! She loves to make people laugh, so at least when she's laughing along with you, you'll know she'll always have a hot smile. And I don't think that booty's gonna change anytime soon! According to P (thats my new nickname for her, cause I can't correctly type her full name), what makes her unique is her VOLUPTUOUS booty. She'll put her family and friends first, so loyalty's a big plus on this hottie. I'm sorry, you wanted to hear more about the booty? I am in love with this girls butt. It's effin unreal. It's got all the good butt qualities! It's smackable, grab-able, biteable(?) and lovable. So... beautiful face, she's funny and the butt. J-Lo better watch her back(side) cause P ain't far behind. There was supposed to be a pun in there, but it got lost in translation. P can also party like a rockstar on Friday, then sit in and watch movies all day Saturday. Versatility is a must for a hottie. Dress her up or down, this girl still looks hawt! I'm guessing she's Italian so she can probably cook up some shit you can pronounce. PIZON!! If I could build a hottie from scratch, I think this is what the end product would be. Booty!!!....sorry. I can't get over that thing. I need to go scour the Bucks County bars and find this hottie ASAP. See ya tomorrow. If I have a massive hangover, I probably didn't find her, or I did but don't remember or didn't have the yams to say hello. Either way...if I have red eyes...leave me alone.

Tip of the Day

Q: What type of body do you prefer on guys?

A: I prefer at least 6foot-6' -whatever. Love them tall. Dark hair and light eyes. Love a flawless body but lets be real it isnt going to be like that forever. So I dont mind a little something to grab onto. Great personality and can make me laugh.

Ok ok...I'm like 3 for 4 here. We can go 4 for 4, Pasqualina, if you decide that a flaw-FULL body is acceptable. Very many flaws. not much of an upside....and I'm poor. Shit...forget I said anything. Although, I'm suddenly psyched about the upcoming Sixers season.

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