GIRL ON A SOAP BOX....
I was having dinner with a few of my closest girlfriends the other night. We do what all girls do. There is wine involved, some food, and catching up about what's going on in our lives. Of course, that includes a man. A man entering, a man exiting, and all the grief in between. My girlfriend told me the horrific story of how her boyfriend of 4 years has ended their relationship. This is the second time this week that I have heard of a horrendous break-up. What goes through a man's head? I have truly come to the conclusion that men have absolutely NO IDEA HOW TO END A RELATIONSHIP. Getting back to my girlfriend, she and her man have had a rocky 5 or 6 months. It was getting to the point where there was talk of "where does the relationship go from here?" Both in their mid-thirties, loved each other, did the time together, but should they get engaged? Long story short, it was stress. They had a huge fight, and moved apart, but still seeing each other. Then started the rumors that a female co-worker of his, started blogging all over Myspace that she was moving into our city with her new boyfriend (which was insinuated to be my gal's boyfriend) So of course after a bottle of wine, we hopped on myspace to investigate (like good girlfriends do) and there it was. All in print with hearts and photo's. She was crushed. He adamantly denied it.Yet, he won't speak to her. ONLY THROUGH EMAIL! Fours years and living together for things to end this way? Are you serious?
Bad break-up #2 involves two very close friends for many years that take things to the next level. The man loves her from here to kingdom come, can't get enough of her. She can't spend the amount of time as he'd like with him but she adores him just the same. This causes petty arguments and uncertainty. Making him feel "vulnerable" to her. She reassures him time and again, things are great. She makes great efforts to make this guy feel secure. Then comes the roller-coaster antics. He wants to slow down, he loves her too much, they need to step back and chill out. The girl tries to figure out what that means since her guy still is calling everyday and texting "I love you's." It was as if there were no boundaries and asking him would only cause an argument. Long story short, girl drops everything to spend a night with him. It was a great night. He misses her so much. He wants to meet her father. He loves her and was so happy she was there with him. Even as she is leaving, he asks her to stay longer. Less than 24 hours after her visit, she comes home to an EMAIL. Something is missing. I don't feel the same (like he did less than 24hrs ago) Still loves her but he's sorry. It's done. He hopes they can still be friends. How insane is that? Close friends for many years and he ends it in an EMAIL?? Is this not the equivalent to Carrie's "post-it?" I say NO! No room for friends when you end things like that! Was this guy serious?? ICK!
NOTE TO GUYS; Break-ups are meant to be difficult. There are many ways to break-up and not one of them include a text message, an email or a post-it! (Thank you Carrie Bradshaw!) These type's of break-up's can negatively affect the person being dumped by making them feel as if they didn't mean enough to their partner to deserve a face-to-face break-up. Women just want a dignified ending to a meaningful relationship. Ending a relationship is never easy but the best way is to meet face to face and explain your reasons tactfully. Choosing text or email shows no respect for the other person or the time spent together. You can fool yourself into thinking that you are still a good person because you didn't have to deal the person's hurt reaction & you said what you needed to say without facing them. The truth is, how you ended it, really shows the person that you truly are.
PS- I would be happy to take comments on this subject. Email me at AtomicXBombshell@yahoo.com