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Thursday, December 6, 2007

She Got Me So Hypnotized, The Way This Hottie Rollin' Round And Round


Those of you who came to our party may notice Ashley. She worked for us selling the raffle tickets for the Win a Date with a Hottie. She's a 21 year old dancer/actress from Philly. Ash (yeah, I'm gonna play it up like we're on a pet name basis. We're not, but you don't know that) is certainly not afraid to tell it like it is. This hottie's tall, beautiful, and a spicy burrito in your stomach after a long night of drinking. When she was selling the raffle tickets for us, she had to lay the verbal smackdown on a few of the guys. The guys would just start spewing verbal diarrhea out their mouths, and she'd put them in their place. It was kind of fun to watch for a while...considering it wasn't me getting shot down. On a side note guys, use some sense of class. Some of the shit this girl was coming up to me and repeating was absolutely ridiculous. Maybe that's why it is so hard to pick up a woman when we're out. I mean, before you even go up to her she has a preconceived notion that your just gonna walk up and scream, "BREASTS!" right in her face. Use your goddamn brain for a minute and ask yourself if your just shitting out of your mouth, or if you actually have something to gain with your comment. Most likely NO. Anywho, back to our hottie. The body here is siiiiiiiick. Like top notch. So fellas...hands where I can see 'em please...aka above your desk, all ten fingers on the keyboard...unless your like the Phil's pitcher with 12 fingers. Give this hottie a round of applause for helping us our Saturday night, and for generally just being hot. I'm gonna skip proposing anymore. Apparently women aren't into marrying guys they don't really know, or never even met. But I mean, if the money's there and it looks like a stable, loving environment, how can I not ask? Maybe I'll just go straight for dinner and a movie ..... POPCORN TRICK!

Tip of the Day

Q: If you had ONE piece of dating advice to give guys....what would it be?

A: BE A MAN!!! Stop grooming yourselves so you look like a woman!! Stop plucking your eyebrows (unless u have a unibrow), stop shaving your armpits and arms and legs, stop using so much product you have helmet head, no manis or pedis or facials, and PLEASE have a sense of humor especially about yourself!!

OUCH. Step up fellas. You just got bitchslapped. I'm glad I don't hang out where dude wear makeup. I don't have the stomach for it.